As you read the title of this article, some of you started getting really excited because you might have been thinking, “Nice, somebody’s finally going to let me get revenge on the people who drive me crazy!” You may already have a name in mind. Unfortunately, I’m going to disappoint you.
When I speak of getting even, I’m talking about making sure our mood is even. If you’re like me, sometimes your mood can be on the high side and other times it can be low. Some days you feel very positive because everything is going great, and other days you may feel disappointed and critical. That’s life. The challenge is trying to even out the highs and lows and staying somewhere in the middle. In other words, keeping your mood swings in balance.
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve worked hard to get better control of my attitude because I realize that when I’m more even, my family is more even tempered.
That’s why it’s important that when you start to feel a chill in the air that’s not from the temperature, you should try to warm things up with a smile or a kind word. Sometimes that’s all it takes. When I don’t let things get out of proportion on the high or low side, my family benefits and I benefit. What is your personality type? Is it easy for you to get worked up over stuff that’s pretty insignificant? Do you sometimes find yourself getting easily frustrated over something that later on you realize wasn’t such a big deal? If so, I would encourage you to do what you can to get even, and there are some very practical ways to accomplish that goal.
Make sure you learn from the past. Reflect on the number of times you found yourself getting overly frustrated and then wishing that you hadn’t acted that way. Try to learn from your mistakes.
Don’t be afraid to ask other people to help you. Someone in your family, perhaps your wife, may be able to identify when your mood is off balance. They could help you work through the reasons behind your less-than-positive attitude before it gets out of hand. But you have to be teachable and open to that kind of correction. Try not to let your pride stand in the way of self-improvement.
If you find it really difficult to stay even, you might consider pursuing professional counseling. It’s likely that you are going through a tough situation and the combination of time and talking it out with someone will hopefully help your mood and stability improve.
Lastly, just make the change. If you begin to get even on a lot of small issues, you will develop patterns that will translate into handling bigger issues better as well. I’m not saying you will never falter or fall back into old patterns, but you will definitely be more likely to stay even more often.
When your mood starts trending in a downward direction, instead of giving in to those feelings, get even and start winning more often at home.