Marriage At Risk: Asking Questions

For the last couple weeks, we’ve been talking about marriages at risk, highlighting the kinds of behavior that can suggest weak spots in a relationship between a husband and wife.

In order to assess the risks, we’ve discussed, you need to ask two sets of questions here: Problem Questions and Solution Questions. Problem Questions help to acknowledge and identify risky behaviors; Solution Questions make an effort to fix things.

First, am I keeping secrets? Am I hiding things from my spouse? Am I covering for myself and my actions?

What have I been keeping secrets about, and how can I change those things? In what ways can I build trust in our relationship? How can I develop honesty in my own life?

Second, am I ‘looking outside’ for fulfillment? Am I letting myself get interested in romance or sex with someone other than my spouse? Have I given up on intimacy at home?

As a solution for ‘looking outside,’ how can I turn things around and find fulfillment within my marriage? How can I cut off relationships that threaten my connection with my spouse?

Lastly, am I thinking ‘me’? Am I wrapped up in myself to the point that it’s hurting my marriage? Do I make important decisions without consulting my spouse first?

As a solution for thinking ‘me,’ how can I be thoughtful and caring toward my spouse? What’s a meaningful way for me to encourage him or her?

Take some time to look for at-risk behaviors in your marriage, and then ask the tough questions in order to make your relationship more secure.  After all, the easiest way to stay married for life and keep your marriage out of risk is to find solutions long before the problems show up.