How To Protect Your Marriage And Family From Pornography
The use of pornography in any form has always had a damaging effect on marriages, and the millions of porn sites easily available on the internet are cause for even greater concern.
My own experience as a Christian counselor in addition to conversations I’ve had suggest a dramatic increase in the number of couples who have problems in their marriage due to either spouse’s use of porn. Marriages are on the verge of being destroyed because the use of porn can develop into an addiction that interferes with every part of a healthy relationship.
The partner who is not engaging in pornography use is often confused when their spouse’s behavior seems to change, and is hurt, dismayed, and at a loss for what to do when the pornography use is discovered. Also, some couples engage in pornography use together, which can create unhealthy relationship dynamics.
Studies have shown that people who frequently look at pornography:
– May develop unrealistic expectations of a partner’s appearance and behavior (including sexual behavior).
– May have difficulty forming and sustaining relationships.
– May have trouble feeling sexually satisfied.
Despite the problems that come from pornography, I encourage any individuals or couples who experience this problem not to lose hope for themselves and their marriages. I have seen many people heal and transform their lives, overcoming the damage caused when pornography took hold. Reach out for help, and work toward healing. If you struggle with pornography, confess the problem to your spouse and work together to seek professional help to heal.
You can also take further steps to protect yourself and your family, starting by making your home a place where pornography does not have a presence. Here are some practical ways to do that:
> Ensure there is no room for pornography in your own life.
You can’t assume you can keep pornography from your children if you
make allowances for it yourself.
> Remove any form of pornography in your home.
Make it your business to find forms of pornography in magazines,
computer files, movies, and more in your home so you can get rid of it.
> Take preventative measures with electronics.
Monitor phone bills, mail, email, and texts; block offending channels on
your TV and websites on all computers; secure internet streaming
> Demonstrate appropriate, respectful, and positive interactions with your spouse.
Watching adults interact with the opposite sex in a healthy way
models appropriate behavior for children and teens.
> Teach children the basics of healthy sexuality in an open, positive way.
Children can be tempted to view pornography to learn things you
should intentionally be teaching them about sex. Create a safe and
warm environment for your children to discuss and ask questions about
Start today by taking action on one of the above steps. God will help you through the actions you take, and through your willingness to be diligent and open to change.
If you would like to purchase click “Precscriptions for Healthy Relationships”
– Excerpt from Prescriptions for Healthy Relationships by Dr. Peter Newhouse